OH! WHAT’S HAPPENED TO ME? WHAT IS MY WORLD COMING TO? I MIGHT TAKE FLIGHT IN FRIGHT!

Granny Smith Apples

Often it is advised one should shed one’s load; share the despair. By doing so one’s load is said to become light. Well, here I go…I’ll try with all my might (if I’ve got any left)! 

The other day I got the shock of my life.  I couldn’t find what I was searching for.  Even after I cleaned my glasses until they sparkled and I could see myself in them, I couldn’t find what I was looking for.  Like a woman possessed frantically I searched high and low, but it was nowhere to be seen.  It couldn’t be found; not here, not there; not anywhere! How could this happen?  Usually I’m more diligent; ever on guard; always prepared.  If I had a naughty corner I would’ve sat in it – for a week at least - repeating over and over ad infinitum; “I will never run out of Vegemite ever again!” 

Panicking, I knew there was no time to waste. Fruitlessly for hours I’d already searched. The clock was ticking…faster and faster!  

Despair engulfed my very being. Heart palpitations had set in. Such an embarrassing blight to have run out of Vegemite!

Suffering unbridled shame, red-faced, I lowered my head at my desperate plight. In fact, since the horrifying discovery – one that’s never happened to me before - whenever I think about my scandalous oversight my head lowers automatically causing me to prop it upright.  Like now as I write about my shocking oversight I’m propping up my head. I can’t see my monitor when it plops down. Also, it lands on my keyboard making it difficult to type. 

Downing tools and donning clothes off to IGA I hastened; incognito, naturally, because I didn’t want anyone to recognise me during my outrageously disconcerting moment of desperation.

My lack of Vegemite needed rectifying immediately before anyone discovered my humiliating secret.

You might consider my anguish at the plight of being without Vegemite a mite trite. You might make light of it, but that’s alright. 

The uninitiated say it’s an acquired taste.  My taste for Vegemite was acquired long before my memory kicked into gear.   I’m never without a jar of Vegemite - until the other day! 

A few years ago a friend from the US visited for a couple of weeks. During his visit I introduced him to our iconic Aussie spread; but only a little at a time; not lashings of it, like many people thoughtlessly do when attempting to introduce Vegemite to folk not familiar with its taste.   Even though I was brought up with Vegemite I understand what a shock to the system the initial taste would be if it was plastered thickly over bread or crackers; and why the newcomers to the yeast spread run screaming out the door to catch the first flight back home never again wanting to be within tongue’s reach of our mighty ‘mite!

My US friend didn’t run away in hysterics; he liked it - in small doses – not layered thickly like plaster on his toast or bread.  I don’t even like Vegemite plastered too thickly.  There is a limit to everything!  Less is more!

Often when I was a little girl I was given a mug of hot Vegemite broth. It was good for settling an upset tummy, too; far better tasting than any medicine, in my opinion…then and now.

I love fresh bread spread with butter and Vegemite, and then topped with slices of Granny Smith apples (green apples to those also uninitiated to our Aussie Granny Smiths). Yum! Yum!  

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Granny_Smith

And how wonderful Vita-Wheat biscuits/crackers are with butter and Vegemite...push two crackers together and watch the curls of combined butter and Vegemite ooze through the holes.  Then lick them off....delicious fun!!

Vegemite and avocado on toast...another healthy breakfast...or lunch...or whenever the mood takes hold!

During my Hinchinbrook Island days, one staff member’s culinary trick was to spread Vegemite over her pizza bases; then she’d top them off with baked beans and cheese.  I’ve never gone that far…but I imagine (know) there are worse things to eat. 

Now for something completely different - here’s a Vegemite pizza you might like to try…

Kumara-Rosemary-Vegemite Pizza: Thinly slice 300g kumara; place on lined baking tray; spray with oil; bake in 200C oven, 20-25mins, or until just tender. Sift together 1c flour, 1tsp yeast, 1/2tsp salt and 1/4tsp sugar; ad 1/3c lukewarm water and 1tbs olive oil; stir to make dough. Turn onto lightly floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic. Place in oiled bowl; cover; let stand in warm area, 30mins or until doubled. Roll out dough on floured surface to about 20x30cm rectangle; place on floured tray; spread with 1tbs Vegemite; top with kumara, fresh rosemary and 2/3c grated mozzarella or tasty cheddar; bake in 200C oven, 10-15mins.

Cheesy Vegemite Muffins: Whisk 1c milk, 1/3c oil, 1/4c Vegemite and 2 eggs in bowl; add 2c S.R. flour and 1tsp baking powder, 3 finely-chopped shallots and 5 slices cheese singles, roughly chopped; mixed until just combined; spoon into 12 lightly greased ½-cup capacity muffin pans. Bake in 200C oven, 15-20mins.

Vegemite-Rosemary Cutlets: Combine 1tbs Vegemite, 1/4c honey, 2tbs finely chopped rosemary leaves and 2tbs olive oil; pour over 12 trimmed lamb cutlets; chill 2hrs. Barbecue cutlets over medium heat, 3-4mins per side, or cooked to your liking. Marinade is suitable for lamb, beef, pork and chicken.

Vegemite-Cheese-Sausage Rolls: Grab 600g quality beef sausages; remove filling from casing; place in bowl. Process 2c grated cheese, 2 slices of bread (made into crumbs), 1 onion, 2 garlic cloves, 1 egg, 1tbs Vegemite and 1-1/2tbs white sugar; add to sausage meat; mix well; cook a little bit of the mixture to check for seasonings; adjust accordingly. Chill10mins. Cut 3 sheets puff pastry lengthways. Divide mix into 6; roll into sausage shape; place in centre of each pastry rectangle; brush pastry with egg wash; seal over filling; chill 10mins; brush to with the egg wash. Bake at 200C, 20-25mins until