THE CUSTOMER IS NOT ALWAYS RIGHT!

Diane Cilento with then husband, Sean Connery

Diane and Paul Newman in "Hiombre"

My first foray into the hectic, but fun hospitality industry was in 1969.

As well as my full-time day job conducted from Monday to Friday, I waitressed, at night, in an eatery in St. Paul’s Terrace, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane.  

“The Pelican Tavern” had been built by the owner-chef, Mr. Kyriol Wypow.  In the 1920s, as a young man, Mr. Wypow escaped Russia (Kiev, Ukraine) because he didn’t like the way life was heading after the Russian Revolution. He made his way down through Romania, Greece and Turkey, ending up, at first, in South Australia, before choosing Queensland to be his final destination. 

He married an Australian lass, and together they settled in the Brisbane suburb of St. Lucia.  Their next door neighbours were Sir Raphael and Lady Phyllis Cilento, both leaders in medical research et al. Also, they were the parents of well-known actress, the late, Diane Cilento (who was once married to Sean Connery).  Mr. Wypow, as I always called him, was Diane’s godfather. It was he who urged her to go further afield...to venture overseas...to expand her career.

 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raphael_Cilento

 http://adb.anu.edu.au/biography/cilento-phyllis-dorothy-12318

 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diane_Cilento

One evening at the Tavern a group of happy diners arrived prepared for a pleasant evening. When presented with menus, they asked if they could delay ordering because a tardy friend was yet to join them. I said it would be fine, and left menus for them to peruse. Like a dignitary of high rank, their mate arrived almost an hour later, offering no apology. 

Orders were taken; promptly prepared, and served.  Empty plates were cleared from the table at meal’s end.

Readying to depart, the group pooled resources to settle the check.  

Of course, in every crowd there is always one who chooses to buck the system.  The cocky straggler kicked up a stink.  A show pony, loudly he declared he wasn’t going to pay because of the lateness of his dinner - blah blah blah! 

Politely, but firmly, I told the uncouth fellow there would be no dispute; he would pay for his meal, while bringing to his notice he had obviously enjoyed his dinner because not a crumb had been left on his plate.

Standing my ground, I refused to move until he handed over his dough – dough, not of the floury kind.

Relenting, he paid, albeit begrudgingly.

Being one who loved playing to an audience, with a huff, a puff, and nose in the air, haughtily he announced for all to hear he was from Sydney, visiting Brisbane for the first time.

To impress his point further, he declared: “I won’t be coming back here again!” 

Not missing a beat, with a smile, I responded; “Great!  That’s the best news I’ve heard in ages!” 

Not another word did he utter.

Approaching the exit, he ripped a candle from its holder on a table, and threw it at me.  He missed. Other than laugh, I didn’t flinch.

His companions, embarrassed by his surly, unwarranted behaviour, apologised on his behalf.  The arrogant fellow should’ve been apologetic, not his friends. 

He was a perfect example the customer is not always right.

Entering someone’s yard, and brazenly taking fruit or vegetables from their garden without permission is theft. 

Similar applies to customers who eat fruit from displays in supermarkets, or greengrocery shops with the belief it is their right to do so. It is not. Their behaviour is wrong. It’s offensive. Buy first...eat later. 

Grapes, cherries, peaches etc., aren’t for a customer’s eating at will.  Eating fruit from store display cases is shoplifting.  Pure and simple - in black and white...it’s stealing...no ifs...no buts. 

Putting the pips, after gorging, back among the fruit is disgraceful, disgusting and unhygienic. This crude, ignorant conduct happens far too often.  Too often I discovered this flagrant, sickening behaviour when I had my greengrocery-health food shop in Noosa years ago. It’s crass discourtesy. It’s also not a good look to maul the produce.

  

If I went into the bakery, and took a bite out of a bun or muffin to see if I liked it or not...can you imagine the uproar my action would cause?  

I’m going to open a few olive jars next time I’m in that particular aisle in the local supermarket. I’ll try various olives to see which ones I prefer. With me I’ll take a teaspoon so I can taste-test jams, pickles etc. Try before I buy! 

Not being partial to raw meat, the meat section is safe.  Hold the horses! I could take along a one-burner primus stove. A great idea... perhaps I’ll crack an egg, or two, too...

PS....there were times in my shop I would find an apple...bite taken from it...and the ruined fruit replaced in the display...bite-side down!!!!! 

Pizza Dough: Combine 1-1/2c warm water, 2tbs sugar and 2-1/4tsp active dry yeast in small bowl. Let sit mins. Mix 3-3/4c plain flour and 1tbs salt together in mixer bowl fitted with dough hook. Add 3tbs x-virgin olive oil to yeast. Pour yeast mixture into flour; knead on low speed 10mins. (If mixing by hand, knead dough for same amount of time.) Place dough in a lightly oiled bowl, turning to coat. Cover with plastic wrap; let rise in a warm place 1 hour. Punch dough down; divide in half. Shape into 2 balls; lightly brush dough balls with olive oil; cover completely with plastic wrap. Let rise 45mins. Preheat oven 230C. Lightly grease pizza pan, or dust with cornmeal; pat each dough ball with your fingers; pat out from centre to edge, leaving outer edge a bit thick; top with favourite toppings. Bake 10-15mins.

BBQ Chicken Pizza Topping: Spread top of dough with quality BBQ sauce. Toss chopped/shredded cooked chicken in more BBQ sauce; scatter over dough; add shredded mozzarella, shredded smoked gouda and some thinly sliced red onion.

Brownie Fruit Pizza: Grease deep dish 12-inch pizza pan; line base with round of paper; butter paper; dust pan with 1tsp cocoa; set aside. Combine 2/3c plain flour, 2/3c cocoa, 1tbs cornflour and 1/2tsp salt; set aside. Combine 1c sugar, 3/4c brown sugar, 1/2c melted butter and 1/4c veg oil. Blend in 3 eggs one at a time; add 2tsp vanilla with last egg. Add in flour/cocoa; mix until just combined; add 1/3c mini-choc chips. Spread evenly in pan. Bake at 160C, 18-20mins; cool completely. Frosting: In bowl, blend 170g cream cheese, 1c icing sugar and 1/2ts vanilla until smooth and slightly fluffy. Spread over base; chill 60mins, or longer. Add varied choice of colourful fresh fruit just before serving. If desired warm 2tbsp jam; whisk to smooth; spread over fruit with pastry brush. Cut into slices; serve immediately for best results. 

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