PAPA WAS A ROLLING STONE....

Peter Finch as "Macauley" and Dana Wilson playing his daughter "Buster" in the 1957 movie "The Shiralee"

Come this time of the year I’m always at a loss for words. “What? You - at a loss for words - never!”  I hear you screaming in disbelief!  Shhhh! You’ll wake up the neighbourhood!  If you don’t believe what I’m admitting it’s time for you to sit up and take notice. Prepare yourself if you plan to continue reading because you might be in for a shock.    What I say is true!  
 

Yesterday, Sunday, 4^th September was Father’s Day here in Australia.  I assume, however, if you’re an Aussie you were already aware of this fact without me having to give you a mighty wake-up nudge.

Not ever having had the experience of a father playing a role in my life I never quite know what to write about when Father’s Day comes around.  I can only go by what I’ve observed from the lives of others. And, because I’m not a sticky-beak, this probably means I’ve not gained much information at all. 

I’m not, and never have been, a person who envies what others have; how big their homes are; how much money they have etc. I think perhaps there were times when I was a child I did wonder what it would’ve been like to be in the shoes of my friends, all of whom had fathers, but I didn’t ponder on the thought at length or in depth.  

Even though there must have been children other than my brother, Graham and me who lived in fatherless homes there are none that I can recall.   

Maybe it was different in the major cities, but in a small town like Gympie of the late Forties and the Fifties the greater majority of families consisted of both a father and a mother. 

For a few years, a few years far too long our stepfather played a role in our lives...more like “terrorised” than “played”.  He was an arse-hole of the first degree (and that's putting it as politely as I can when in open company).  He was one committed to beating on women – namely our mother. 

Around 1950 he was run out of town by the Gympie police with strict instructions never to return.  The police had the power to issues such orders in those years.  When that mongrel left - a heavy, dark cloud lifted allowing some light into our lives. 

Even as one so young, I hated the man.  He is now long dead, having died when I was 16 years old (I was over the moon when I heard the news; also I was disappointed at the same time because I wanted to be able to confront him, eye-to-eye....adult-to-adult, and, by him dying, he took that away from me before I had an opportunity to do so.  Throughout my childhood I'd promised myself the day would come....).  

I will never forget, nor will I ever forgive.  If that, in the eyes of some, makes me a bad person...for hating and not forgiving...so be it.  It concerns me not. He was a monster, pure and simple...a waste of space and oxygen.

It’s funny how situations change over a few decades.  Nowadays single parent households are far more common than they were when I was a child. Sometimes I think we were the first dysfunctional family – I know we weren’t, but at times if felt like we were even if I’d never heard of the word “dysfunctional” back then, let alone knew its meaning.

Never once did I feel - have I felt - the warmth of a father’s hug.  My brother never had a father to guide and teach him.  The way I look at life I believe it’s of the utmost importance for a boy to have a strong, fair father figure throughout his formation years and beyond. Unfortunately, my late brother never had that in his life.  I wish he had.

The father of my good friend who lived across the street from us, (she remains my dear friend to this day) was a fine gentleman. He was a gentle man; one who always exuded calm kindness.  To this day my memories of him remain fond indeed.

He fathered seven children – six daughters and one son.  Within his immediate and extended family he was known as “Daddy John”.

His wife passed away when their youngest child, my friend, was only eight years old “Daddy John” was a revered, much-loved, stead-fast patriarch of the family. 

If I was given a chance to piece together a father (or father figure) of my choosing...like a giant jigsaw puzzle... I’d fit together characteristics of the following fathers to form the perfect father...for me. 

First off the blocks would have to be Atticus Finch from “To Kill a Mockingbird” (and Gregory Peck who played him in the movie). Toss in Liam Neeson aka Bryan Mills in “Taken”. Having a Dad with his special skills could come in handy in moments of crisis. Add in Spencer Tracy’s character in “Father of the Bride”; also the father Tracy played in “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner”. 

Of course, there is no doubt “Mrs. Doubtfire” would be a sure-fire addition. It’s a given Clark Griswold from the National Lampoon movies would be included. His unwavering determination to ensure his family has a Christmas to remember and vacations of a lifetime has to be admired. Everyone loves Raymond, so I guess he has to stick his nose in. His heart’s always in the right place.  A sense of humour never goes astray. Straight-shooter, man of patience, Marty Crane, Frasier’s dad would be good value.

The father J.K Simmons portrayed in “Juno” is a worthy character, as is the widower father of six sons played by the unforgettable James Stewart in the 1965 American Civil War movie, “Shenandoah”.  I’ll toss in elements of Adam Braverman from the TV series “Parenthood”; as well as the beacon of hope, the heroic father in Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road”.

Last, but by no means least, is one of our most iconic characters – novelist D’Arcy Niland’s Macauley, the salt-of-the-earth father in “The Shiralee”.  In my book, Macauley stands proudly beside Atticus Finch.

If you've never read D'Arcy Niland's "The Shiralee" or seen the 1957 movie starring Peter Finch....try to get hold of both.  The story was also made into a TV film in 1987 starring Bryan Brown as "Macauley" and Rebecca Smart as "Buster".  It is a wonderful story....I'm sure you won't be disappointed....

Papa’s Tapas - Jalapeno Poppers: Process 200g cream cheese till smooth; add ½ red onion, diced; season. Slice 8-10 jalapenos chillies in half lengthwise; remove seeds; leave stems on. Fill each half with cream cheese; then sandwich halves together, pressing firmly.  Roll each chilli in flour to finely coat. Batter - separate 2 large eggs. Whisk yolks in bowl; add 1c flour; add 1/2c beer and 1tbs melted butter; whisk until smooth.  Beat egg whites until stiff; fold gently into batter. Heat vegetable oil in saucepan. Take each floured chilli, holding by the stem and dip into batter to coat. Lightly place in the hot oil; fry 1-2mins on each side until nicely browned. Drain chillies on paper towels; serve with lime sour cream (lime juice added to sour cream and/or sweet chilli jam.

Pop’s Chops:  Combine ¼ onion, finely grated, 1tsp smoked paprika, hot or sweet, 2tsp ground cumin seeds, 2tbs olive oil and 2tbs lemon juice. Coat 12-16 lamb cutlets with marinade; cover; chill overnight. Before cooking, combine 1tbs freshly ground cumin seeds, 1/2tsp sweet paprika and salt; sprinkle lamb liberally with half the spice mix. Grill chops, 5-8mins each side. Serve sprinkled with remaining spices, lemon wedges and flat bread.

Red Wine Chorizo Tapas: heat pan to  med-hot; add 2tbs olive oil, 1 sliced echalion (banana shallot) and a finely chopped garlic clove; fry 2-3mins; add 300g chorizo, cut diagonally into 2.5cm chunks; fry 1-2mins; add 2 bay leaves and 200ml red wine.

Prawns & Chorizo Tapas: heat pan until med-hot, add 2tbs olive oil and 2 sliced garlic cloves; fry 1-2mins; add 500g chorizo, diagonally cut 1/4cm thick; fry 1-2mins.  Add 8 medium prawn, shell-on; season; cook  2-3mins; Add 50ml dry sherry; deglaze pan.  Tip into serving dish; sprinkle over chopped flat-leaf parsley.   You can shell the prawns if that's what you prefer...but don't remove the tails.