KERB YOUR ENTHUSIASM...OR DON’T....

Gympie's Memorial Park

Jacaranda Time on Tamborine Mountain

Eagle Heights Mountain Resort-Hotel

Open Air-Undercover Beer Garden, Eagle Heights Mountain Resort

Indoor and Outdoor Dining

Dressed Up for a Wedding at the Eagle Heights Mountain Resort

Bar Area - Eagle Heights Mountain Resort

You may have noticed over the years I find it difficult to kerb my enthusiasm for repeating myself.

At this time of each year I’m enthused and enraptured by the glorious, blooming jacarandas. The breathtaking brilliance of jacaranda season takes me back to my childhood and teenage years spent in Gympie where the stunning jacaranda trees grew and bloomed prolifically.  During jacaranda season the town became a picturesque sea of purple; a glorious sight to see.  

Up here on the plateau aka mountain top the jacaranda trees have graced us again with their wonderful displays of lilac blossoms.  Soon, the curtain will close, and then, we will have to wait patiently until late 2019 to once more be enhanced by the wonder of their beauty.

Apparently, the Brisbane City Council doesn’t like jacarandas, calling the tree a “weed” because the tree isn’t native to Australia.  The BCC would disagree with my enthusiasm. Those reckless cowboys want to rip jacaranda trees out by their roots, and have done so in some areas.

Similar to most of us, my roots came from elsewhere.  

My maternal ancestors immigrated to Australia from the Scottish Highlands and Ireland in the mid-1800s. Later on, in the early 1900s, my paternal grandparents wandered in from Northern Ireland, settling in Rockhampton, Central Queensland, otherwise now known as the “Capricorn Coast” because Rocky, the “Beef Capital of Australia” sits upon...albeit gently...the Tropic of Capricorn.

Therefore, with the above being the facts, like the jacaranda tree, I must be a weed. 

Shhh! Don’t tell the Brisbane City Council!

On the subject of kerbing one’s enthusiasm, the recent over-the-top brouhaha about which side of the bread Bunnings Hardware Stores should place their fried onions during their Saturday sausages sizzles...under or over said sausage... reminds me of an incident which occurred one Sunday shortly after I arrived here on the hill. 

At the time, I was one of the happy cooks/chefs at the expansive Eagle Heights Mountain Resort (there were three of us), with its spectacular views - not that I got many opportunities to appreciate the magnificent vista when working. 

  

Sundays, in particular, were always very busy with visitors from far, wide and below, all wanting to enjoy not just the views, but the delicious fare on offer. 

As was our habit (necessity), my co-workers and I had done our prep – and lots of it.

We, along with the stoves and fryers were fired up and ready to go, taking no prisoners along the way.  

The doors opened, and in flooded an enthusiastic crowd of hungry diners, far more than we had expected...and let me tell you...we had expected, and prepared for, a crowd! 

On that particular Sunday everyone within coo-ee and beyond descended upon the Eagle Heights Mountain Resort Hotel for lunch.  Everything we’d prepped rapidly disappeared; and we had prepared a tonne.  Frantically, when possible, we chopped up more ingredients...multi-tasking at its best!  No fingers were lost in the process...

The menu on offer was vast and varied.  The broad choice also included burgers and steak sandwiches, each individually plated and served with chips/fries and extra salad on the side.

Out of the madding crowd he emerged to place his order...a fellow in his late 20s/early 30s.  His excitement about his order of a hamburger and fries was palpable. His order might’ve been a steak sandwich, not a burger – that’s by the by - but, pertinently, at the very moment of his salivating, drooling appearance, we’d just run out of sliced onions!   Oh! Dear!

From the look on his face when, politely, I informed him of the unavoidable, dire situation I thought I’d inadvertently announced the world was due to end within a few minutes, and his time was up. 

The desperate diner’s face distorted like that of a two year old about to break into tears and throw a tantrum.  The fellow was unable to kerb his distress – his emotions were raw and visible for all to see. 

Sure...he probably sheds tears when peeling and chopping onions, but to cry because he couldn’t have fried onions on his burger or steak sandwich was a bit over the top; a little underwhelming.

I had to kerb my enthusiasm in wanting to slap him across his face while telling him to wake up to himself!

You’ll be proud of me...I succeeded in kerbing my enthusiasm....just!

(For my US readers....We Aussies spell kerb - "kerb"...not "curb" as you do.  The meanings are the same).

Cheesy Onion Potato Gratin: Whisk 1tbs finely chopped parsley, 1/2c breadcrumbs and 1tsp minced garlic; season; set aside. Put 700g baby chats in pot of salted water; cook until tender; drain. Peel 700g pickling onions.  Place 240gx2cm bacon pieces in a pan; cover with 1cm water. Cook, shaking pan occasionally, until water evaporates and bacon begins to crisp and brown. Add potatoes, onions, 2tbs cream, and 1tbs chopped parsley; toss to combine; season. Put in rectangular casserole dish; cover with grated gruyere; place in 205C oven; bake 10-15mins.  Sprinkle breadcrumb mixture over top; return to oven until browned.

Onion-Spinach Bread: Preheat oven, 176C.  Heat 2tsp olive oil in pan over med-heat; add 1 thinly sliced large brown onion; season. Cook 10mins, reduce heat to med-low; cook until onions are golden. Add 1tsp olive oil to onions; stir in 2 minced garlic cloves and 2 packed cups fresh spinach leaves. Stir until spinach wilts, about 1min. Remove from heat. In bowl, whisk 2-1/2c plain flour, 2tsp baking powder and 1/2tsp salt. In a bowl, combine 2 lightly beaten eggs, 3/4c milk, and 2/3^rd cup x-virgin olive oil. Whisk well until combined. Pour flour mixture into eggs; stir until just combined. Don’t over-mix or bread will become tough. Add spinach mixture and 30g crumbled fetta; stir until just combined. Grease loaf pan. Spoon 1tbs flour into pan; tap flour around pan. Shake out excess. Scoop batter into pan; smooth top. Bake until top is light golden and inserted wooden skewer comes out dry, 35-40 mins. Cool 15mins, then remove from pan; cool on wire rack.

Onion Rings: Slice 2 large onions into rings.  Place separated rings in bowl; cover with 1c buttermilk. Cover; chill 1hr or up to 24hrs. Combine 2c plain flour, 1tbs salt, 2tsp smoked paprika, 1tsp garlic pow3der and 1/2tsp cayenne; drain onions; toss in flour to coat. Shake off excess flour; in batches cook in hot oil.

DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY...

The Mavericks....Back in My Arms Again...they never left!!

I’ve just been enjoying a video clip of the eclectic US band, “The Mavericks” performing their 1998 huge hit single “Dance the Night Away”.   

The joyful clip was filmed in a supermarket, trumpets a-blaring, guitars a-twanging and drums a-beating; shoppers tripping the light fantastic, dancing up a storm up along the aisles - wriggling their rumps as they hoof it.  Be-bopping, doing the Shimmy-Shimmy-Shake like it never went out of Vogue.  Such fun!  Let’s face it!  We could do with a bit more fun and laughter – a lot more - these days.

I’m a long-time fan of “The Mavericks”, and have a couple of their CDS among my vast and varied collection.  

Next time I visit IGA, our major supermarket up here on the hill, I might just bust a few of moves to get the joint hopping as I Cha-Cha around the green-grocery section.  The ladies in that department already acknowledge the fact I’m a bit of a fruit loop, so they won’t take any notice. Knowing them, they’ll swing their heels and join me in the Mashed Potato. 

Maybe Neville, the boss butcher, is prepared to do The Chicken.   

As we only get a fleeting glimpse of his side-kick, Sir Loin nowadays because, even though he hasn’t given up his knighthood, Sir Loin has hung up his knives, and taken up a pick, a hoe and a shovel - “Hoe” as in garden tool - Neville might step up to the chopping block in his stead..  

Sir Loin, aka Nathan, the butcher, is elsewhere doing the Hully Gully down in the gully, 

Neville, even though we crack a few jokes between each other, many jokes, probably would chuck a wobbly, ordering me to stop mincing about and rack off if I ask him to do The Chicken with me.  It’s worth a try, though!

On the top side, I’m not sensitive about some things.  I can handle a rib or two. I enjoy a good belly laugh.

To increase the interest and attention in my performance, I’ll appear as mutton dressed up as lamb.  After which, I’ll shake a leg, Twist around, and then make a rapid escape...before I’m carted away to be served up as chopped liver to the authorities or an institution.

Of course, you do realise I’m writing this tongue in cheek.  I won’t be sticking my neck out by making more of a fool of myself than I usually do. 

Doing the Jitterbug up and down the supermarket aisles with James would be a lark, if I didn’t break something in the meantime...including, a bone or two of my own - and, if my complaining hips allowed me to be hip!  

Perhaps I should stick to Hand-Jiving.  It was always good fun.  And, you can be seated while doing it, which is a plus....when the hips refuse to be hip!

I Rockabilly, too, if I happen to stumble into him when I’m out on The Stroll I undertake every other day down along the Madison Line.  He likes a bit of Boogie Woogie, but he can be a bit of a Jerk at times. 

He Struts his stuff, and was doing so the day I saw the Bunny Hop. Alarmed, I watched the Fox Trot after it. 

I was trying to Hitch-Hike on the day in question, but I had to put that in Limbo while I applied the mechanisms of Loco-Motion. 

It was as if a Time Warp had come into play!  I morphed into the Running Man. 

Grabbing The Lawnmower, I turned on The Sprinkler in The Cabbage Patch, disturbing The Worm as I did so. 

However, I succeeded in chasing the fox away.  Off to the barn it danced!  Fortunately, The Pony didn't escape when the gate was left open. He wasn't thirsty so he didn't drink any of the water in the dam.

I loved to dance, and did so very often. 

Being not Hip these present days, I can barely Hop, which is fortunate, in one way.  If I attempted to do the above moves in the supermarket, with a Quick Step or three, they’d Hustle me out the front or back door - Two Steps at a time! 

Oh, well!  It’s a Rap!

Chicken Lettuce Wraps: Pre-heat oven 230C. Line baking tray with foil; grease lightly; put 2 chicken breasts in tray. In bowl, whisk 1/2c sweet chilli sauce, 2tbs soy sauce, 3 minced garlic cloves, 1tbs grated ginger, juice of 1 lime, and 1tsp sriracha, or to taste. Pour half of the sauce over chicken; bake 20-25mins.  Thinly slice ½ a red capsicum and ½ a yellow, 1 carrot and ½ Continental cucumber. Cut chicken into strips.  Evenly spread veggies between lettuce wraps; top with chicken; then chopped peanuts, chopped coriander and more sauce.

Left-over Roast Beef Wraps: Beat 450g cream cheese, 3-1/2tbs horseradish and 3tbs Dijon mustard together in until well blended. Spread a thin layer of the mixture over 12 soft tortillas. Arrange fresh spinach leaves evenly over the tortillas. Place two slices of thinly sliced roast beef over the cream cheese. Sprinkle with grated cheddar. Starting at one end, gently roll up each tortilla into a tight tube. Wrap with foil or cling film to keep wraps tight; store in fridge.

Boogie Woogie Mashed Potato: Place 6 garlic cloves on a double thickness of heavy-duty foil. Drizzle with 1tsp olive oil. Wrap foil around garlic. Bake at 218C, 15-20mins, until softened. Cool 10-15mins. Boil 1-1.2kg scrubbed red potatoes until tender.  Drain; transfer to a large bowl. Squeeze softened garlic into potatoes. Add 125g softened cream cheese, 1/2c cubed butter, 1/2c milk, 1/2tsp each salt and pepper. Mash potatoes until combined. Stir in about 113g Stilton cheese, 6 cooked and crumbled bacon rashers and 2tbs finely chopped parsley. Sprinkle with remaining parsley before serving.

Bacon Jalapeño Twists: Preheat oven 190C. Line 2 baking trays with paper. Gently roll out 1 thawed sheet of puff pastry, adding about 1-inch/2.5cm on each side. Spread 55g cream cheese across puff pastry. Sprinkle 1 diced jalapeño over cream cheese; press in gently so it sticks. Cut into 12 strips. Lay a slice of bacon on top of each pastry strip. Twist together each strip; put on prepared trays. Place 6 twists on each tray. Brush twists with barbecue sauce; sprinkle a little shredded cheddar or Parmesan over each one. Bake, 35-40mins until bacon is crispy. 

BINGEING AND WHINGEING...

Bundaberg Rum Distillery, Bundaberg, ..a city situated on the Burnett River, Queensland

I hope the following plethora of information isn’t too much to ingest in one sitting, but contrary to what you may be thinking, I’m not a binge drinker, other than of water.

The last time I binged on beverages of the alcoholic kind was when I ingested one ice-cold Crownie aka Crown Lager, and three glasses of chilled Rosé during Australia Day afternoon, which, as you’re no doubt aware, still falls on 26^th January.

On that particular afternoon, like a wild animal escaped from the zoo, I went crazy.  I let my hair down Ozzy Osbourne-style. However, no bats were harmed in the process.  During the pleasant street party soiree shared with neighbours who dwell in this exclusive enclave of this plateau the only old bat to lose its head was me.  

Since then, it’s been a “long time between drinks”....with no oasis in sight. Don’t misunderstand me....I’m not whingeing. However, don’t lose hope...all is not lost! I’ve been bingeing in a different style...on my favourite TV series and movies. 

A boring old fruit I am, it would appear to some, but an old soak I am not, even if, at present, my place does smell suspiciously like a distillery – the Bundaberg Rum Distillery. 

Anyone walking by my cabin would think I’m on a 24-hour, seven day-week binge.  

Early last week I soaked a pile of dried fruits and raw walnuts overnight in readiness for the making of my Christmas cakes.   

Each year I make two Christmas cakes - one for me, and one for my ex-husband, Randall.

Once upon a time I used to make my rich, fruit-filled, alcohol-soaked fruit Christmas cakes in September, but these days because I no longer entertain/home cater the way I used to do in years of yore, I now make the trusted, and delicious, boiled fruit cakes.  I love boiled fruit cakes.  My Nana used to make excellent boiled fruit cakes, and I’m reminded of her and my childhood whenever I make them.  

Walnuts join in the fun, along with the rum-soaked mixed fruits (including dried cranberries), crystallised ginger and chopped dates.  I always toss in some cocoa and instant coffee powder/granules to add even more subtle flavour during the boiling.  The cakes are topped with almonds, a few walnuts and glacé cherries.  They are then allowed to do their “thing” in oven.

As is my wont, I soaked the abundance of fruit, walnuts etc., in good old Bundy Rum. 

Of all days to make Christmas cakes was Wednesday of last week.  The day relentless, cyclonic, gale-force winds hit the area.  The day was horrible...horrendous.  I've been in cyclones when living in North Queensland...and it was similar to being in a cyclone, but with no rain....just damaging, dangerous wind.  The heat, also, was unbearable...but bear it I had to do.

It was definitely not a day to be out and about because of flying missiles...tree branches etc.  It was frightening enough being inside.   

The early morning began calmly, but late morning the world turned upside down, and the mayhem began.

Shortly after mid-day, somewhere or other, a flying, out-of-control trampoline cut power to the whole mountain. 

Fortunately, my second cake, which was still in the oven when the power went off at 1.40 pm, had just finished cooking – perfect timing, but unplanned.  

For the ensuing 12 or more hours there was no power on this side of the mountain. The northern side, Eagle Heights, were without power for 24 or so hours.  

While on the subject of bingeing...my fruit cakes like to binge.  They are partial to a noggin or two of rum, and beg for a top up once a week or so until Christmas. 

One can’t blame them because dark rum is a good drop.  Just ask Captain Jack Sparrow, Blackbeard, and their fellow buccaneers.   

Captain Kidd didn’t kid around when it came to a barrel of rum...or a chest of treasure.  Being a Scotsman, Kidd preferred Scotch whisky, though, but swashbuckling pirates couldn’t be choosers when battling the high seas. It was thirsty work, but there was no point whingeing.  A “ho-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum” binge solved the problems. 

Pondering upon the thought...rum could also be the cause of Santa’s red nose, and Rudolph’s!

All the whingeing in the world didn’t halt Captain Kidd’s trial and death sentence.

Kidd certainly had something to whinge about, though, because he was hanged two times.  The first time failed - the rope broke! 

I would’ve had a good old whinge, too, if I‘d been him! I’d be still whingeing.

To employ such poor quality rope was disgraceful!

The story has it, searches still continue to this day for Captain Kidd's hidden treasure. Many are of the belief not all of the loot has been found.  Maybe I need to go off on a trip...shovel in hand....

When the hangman's deed was finally completed, Kidd’s property was greedily snaffled by the crown; some was given to the Royal Hospital, Greenwich.  Since then the hospital has been through a few name changes.

Hopefully, similar won’t apply to our own Lady Cilento Children’s Hospital in Brisbane.  I could whinge about the latter plan (and I do)...but I’ll let you off the hook while I go back to bingeing on Stan...the streaming service, silly!

Choc-Rum Cake: Beat 1c softened butter until fluffy; gradually add 2c sugar, beating well; add 4 large eggs, 1 at a time, along with 1/2c dark rum; beat well until blended. Have 1 cup of hot water on hand.  Combine 2c plain flour, 1c unsweetened cocoa, 1tsp baking powder, 1tsp baking soda, 1/2tsp salt and 1/8^th tsp ground nutmeg; add to butter/sugar in 5 portions, pour a bit of hot water in between each portion. Beat at low speed until well blended; stir in 1tsp each almond and vanilla extracts. Pour batter into 3 greased and floured round cake pans. Bake at 175C about 27mins; cool 10mins; remove from pans; cool on wire racks. Frosting: Beat 250g softened unsalted butter until light and fluffy; add 200g cooled melted dark chocolate; beat 2mins. In another bowl beat 300ml thickened cream and 2tbs caster sugar until soft peaks form. Add cream to chocolate mixture; beat 2mins. Spread 1c frosting atop two layers; stack them; frost exterior with remaining frosting. Chill before serving.

Rum-Prune Tart: Heat oven 190C; set rack in centre. Grease base and sides of 23-24cm fluted, loose bottomed tart/flan tin. Roll 350-400g sweet shortcrust pastry out to 3mm thick; line base and sides of tin. Trim edges; chill 30mins. Bake blind 15mins (filled with rice or dried beans). Remove the rice/beans; return to oven for a further 3-4mins so base is well cooked. Set aside. Place 250g stones, dried prunes, 25g butter, 2tbs sugar and 1-1/2tbs dark rum in saucepan over low heat; stir until prunes are plump, moist and mushy. Stir in 1-1/2tbs dark rum; spread over the tart base. Beat 125g room temp butter, 6tbs caster sugar and 1/2tsp almond essence together until mixture is pale and well whipped. Beat 3 room-temp eggs; add to creamed mixture in small batches, beating well with each addition. Stir in 2tbs cornflour, 3tbs milk, grated lemon rind, lemon juice of 1 lemon and 3/4c ground almonds. It’s likely to separate and curdle a bit — this is normal. Spread over the prunes. Bake at 160C, 35-40mins, until set and golden. Serve warm, dusted with icing sugar.

Mellow Yellow: To juice of 2 limes in cocktail jug, add 40ml Bundy, 90ml brown sugar syrup, 240ml mango and orange nectar; fill with ice; top with ginger beer; Garnish with orange slices and mango cheeks.