Sunday, July 01, 2007

The "Mean Reds" Are Fading Away!

Blame it on the wind, blame it on the chill in the air, blame it on my lack of understanding of my fellow "man" (or theirs of me)....blame it on what you wish...but when the "mean reds" descend, it's time for a poem. It's been quite a while since I posted one of my poems, so I've chosen to burden you with this one today. Meanwhile, I'm going to go and bang my head against the wall, make a cup of capuccino, cuddle the cats...and then hang out the laundry!

I think I must be suffering a "weekend hang-over" (not from over-indulgence) or "Monday-itis" (that started last week). This feeling will pass as will the chilly winds.

I hope everyone had a great weekend.

The first "Bloggers' Convention" was held in Brisbane on Sunday with Robyn, Peter and Wazza in attendance. Unfortunately, because of a prior committment, I missed it...maybe next time. From what I've read, Toowong will never be the same again and a "rose is not a rose" unless worn between the teeth. How could you forget it, Robyn! I so did want a picture of you in tango mode, slinking across Sherwood Road!

Solitude of the Heart

Another day with nary a whisper uttered breaking the silence

Is this solitude of my own selfish choosing a wall a defense

Against intruders of my peace caused by fractious insecurities

Created so long ago each day more profound in its intensity

Is there no where to hide from my secret fears no one to share

Pitifully sad existence my entity my life is there no one to care

Brave countenance a desperate bid to convince others I am strong

Whilst within these walls bearing painful scars from all the wrong

Some battles won but as many lost forever a heart-wrenching war

Never-ending lofty imposing hurdles a-plenty many I dare not soar

Unconquerable mountains hindering my way traversing valleys deep

Impossible to ascend long desperate nights confused unsettled sleep

Repetitiously I continue being to others what they think me to be

Myself a solitary soul desiring concealment hidden for no one to see

How long will this pattern continue before I can acknowledge defeat

A wont to be invisible in disguise perhaps in masquerade or obsolete

Standing at a crossroad endless search for a haven in which to be free

Shrouded in a veil of secrecy overcome by an urgent penchant to flee

Tears well as my strength disintegrates my heartache remains unhealed

Though gallantly I try to escape the pain gathering around me a shield

Surrendering defeated I am swept aside by forceful winds of discontent

Across the surging shores of life my emotions finally hysterically spent

Over the stillness of night piercing the moonlight woefully they echo

Avid devourers of my spirit when will this anguish this suffering let go

(Written by Lee)


  1. Lee
    I have just read your last 3 post.

    My eyes became misty when I read about your Mother.

    The Yellow submarine was quiet the funny story. If they had listened, you would not have had the funny story to share.

    You should have cuddled the cats last. LAUNDRY what a dirty word.

    I am like the book "Give a Mouse a Cookie". I have been saving for a new laundry system for three years. Today I found out I will have to cut off some of my cabinets. Seems as if all machine are now 27 inches wide and my old tub is 25 1/2.

    Take care and hope all goes well for you this week.

  2. Hi Lady are correct...without the guys doing "their own thing"...I would be without the story...and it was a funny time...and was another good challenge to face and beat. ;)

    Laundry is done...the worst part is having to bring the damn stuff back inside again to fold and put away!

    Thanks for your good wishes...I hope your week goes well for you, too.

  3. Sometimes, Lee, I find I have to have a good howl with waterfall tears to let go of the angst that builds up over time.

    Sometimes there's no-one to feel sorry for us but ourselves...and that's ok, too.


  4. Yep...I let the dam walls down last night, Robyn. ;)

  5. Hi Lee,
    Soulful poem, but I hope your usual fun self appears again soon. Maybe the winter is getting to you.
    Take care

  6. Hey old self is never too far away! ;)

  7. that's beautiful , Lee, and I identify with every word.

  8. Thanks for reading my poem, Welsh. :)

  9. Lee what an awesome poem. You are only human and everyone feels this way at certain times in our lives. It is wonderful that you can express it so well in your poem. I someimes struggle with letting people really know who I am and how I really feel, I sometimes feel like I just want everyone to think my life is perfect, perfect marriage, perfect family when really it's not. Sometimes it feels so good after a great cry for me. Take care Lee, there will be better day's

  10. Hi Shelly...we're all guilty of putting up our facades at times...self-protection. :)

    Thanks for your kind words...I'm fine...just a fad I was going through! ;)